Saturday, January 31, 2009

Hip Replacement ...

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Friday, January 30, 2009

Gurinal? ...

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Thursday, January 29, 2009

Pussy - It's What's For Dinner ...

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Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Camel Toe ...

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Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Bad Joke Tuesday #18 ...

A man is in a hotel lobby. He wants to ask the clerk a question. As he turns to go to the front desk, he accidentally bumps into a woman beside him and as he does, his elbow goes into her breast.
They are both quite startled. The man turns to her and says, "Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as your breast, I know you'll forgive me."
She replies, "If your penis is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 436."
__________________
A pianist was hired to play background music for a movie. When it was completed he asked when and where he could see the picture. The producer sheepishly confessed that it was actually a porno film and it was due out in a month.
A month later, the musician went to a porno theatre to see it. With his collar up and dark glasses on, he took a seat in the back row, next to a couple who also seemed to be in disguise.
The movie was even raunchier than he had feared, featuring group sex, S/M and even a dog.
After a while, the embarrassed pianist turned to the couple and said, "I'm only here to listen to the music." "Yeah?" replied the man. "We're only here to see our dog."

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Monday, January 26, 2009

Is It Sweeps Month Already? ...

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Sunday, January 25, 2009

Aim High ...

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Saturday, January 24, 2009

What Aisle Are Those On ? ...

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Friday, January 23, 2009

Strange Product Of The Week ...

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Thursday, January 22, 2009

Something To Ponder ...

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Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Things That Go Bump In The Night ...

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Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Boobs For Obama ,,,

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Bad Joke Tuesday #17 ...

A man decides to buy a new scope for his rifle. He goes to a rifle shop, and asks the clerk to show him a scope.
The clerk takes out a scope, and says to the man, "This scope is so good, you can see my house way up on that hill."
The man takes a look through the scope, and starts laughing.
"What's so funny?" asks the clerk.
"I see a naked man and a naked woman running around in the house." the man replies.
The clerk grabs the scope from the man, and looks at his house. Then he hands two bullets to the man and says, "Here are two bullets, I'll give you this scope for nothing if you take these two bullets, shoot my wife's head off and shoot the guy's dick off."
The man takes another look through the scope and says, "You know what? I think I can do that with one shot!"
__________________
One morning while making breakfast, a man walks up to his wife and pinches her on her butt and says, "You know if you firmed this up we could get rid of your girdle."
While this was on the edge of intolerable, she thought herself better and replied with silence.
The next morning the man woke his wife with a pinch on the breast and said, "You know if you firmed these up we could get rid of your bra."
This was beyond a silence response, so she rolled over and grabbed him by the penis. With a death grip in place she said, "You know if you firmed this up we could get rid of your brother.

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Monday, January 19, 2009

Bungie ...

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Sunday, January 18, 2009

Unique ...

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Saturday, January 17, 2009

Love Is #3 ...

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Friday, January 16, 2009

Wedding Boobs ...

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Thursday, January 15, 2009

Gummi Sutra ...

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Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Penis Origami ...

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Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Bad Joke Tuesday #16 ...

A young man drops his girlfriend off at home after a date. When they reach the front door he leans up against the house with one hand and says to her, "How about a blowjob?"

"What! Are you crazy!"

"Don't worry, it will be quick, " he ensures her.

"No!, Someone might see us..."

"It's just a fast blowjob, " he insists, "and I know you like doing it."

"No!, I said no!"

"Baby... don't be like that."

"Come on baby pleeeeaassseee"

"I'm not going to give you a blow job"

"Why Not baby, it wont take any time at all?"

Suddenly, the girl's younger sister shows up at the door in her nightgown, with her hair a mess, and rubbing her eyes. She looks at them and smirks, "Dad says either you blow him, I blow him, or he'll come downstairs and blow the guy himself... but for God's sake tell your boyfriend to take his hand off the intercom."
_______________________________
A guy walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Gimme a triple!"

So the bartender pours him up a triple and slides it down the bar. The man slams it back.

"Bartender, gimme another!" He bellows, the bartender pours it up, and slides it down the bar. The man slams it back again.

"Bartender, one more!" So the bartender pours it up, and slides it down again. The man slams it back.

"What are you celibrating buddy?"

"My first blowjob", the bartender looks surprised and says "Wow, here have another on the house!"

The man looks up at him and says "Naw, if three dont get the taste out of my mouth, nothing will!"

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Monday, January 12, 2009

I've Got To Clean These Windows ...

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Sunday, January 11, 2009

Bad Seuss 2 ...

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Saturday, January 10, 2009

Love Is #2 ...

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Friday, January 09, 2009

WTF Friday

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Thursday, January 08, 2009

A Picture Is Worth A 1000 Words ...

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Wednesday, January 07, 2009

Head & Shoulders ...

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Tuesday, January 06, 2009

Bad Joke Tuesday #15 ...

A couple who have been married for over 10 years, are sitting at the dinner table. The husband notices that his wife looks a bit unhappy, so he asks. "What's wrong dear?". She responds, " I'm very happy with you and the life that we have, but I really wish that I had bigger breasts". The husband replies, " Honey, I love your tits just the way they are... They are perfect!"

The next day the husband notices that his wife is still unhappy, so again he asks what's wrong and again she complains about her boob size.

This goes on day after day for the next couple of weeks. Finally he gets so annoyed that he says, ''I know how to make your boods larger!''

''How!?!?!?'' she asks.

''Take a piece of toilet paper and rub it in between your boobs every morning.''

''Will that really work?'' she asks.

''Well, it has certainly worked on your ass, hasn't it?'''
___________________________________
Apple is developing a computer chip which will store music in a women's breast implants. This is a major breakthrough, since women are always complaining about men staring at their breasts and not listening to them ...

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